Comments on: This sucks (Part III.) http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/ For moms who can do it all, but wonder why they should. Sun, 05 Feb 2012 09:10:15 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Jennifer Stimson http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-13490 Jennifer Stimson Fri, 30 Dec 2011 22:40:35 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-13490 I think people should just pump in their cube if not offered a space. At this point in my bfding and pumping experience the observers would be more mortified than me. I think if more people did that, a suitable space would be found. Yes, it looks weird but it's about feeding a baby. I think people should just pump in their cube if not offered a space. At this point in my bfding and pumping experience the observers would be more mortified than me. I think if more people did that, a suitable space would be found. Yes, it looks weird but it’s about feeding a baby.

]]> By: Jill B http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-5423 Jill B Fri, 06 May 2011 15:36:21 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-5423 I am also an architect. Our first office did not have that great of a space - large conf. room without a lock, and I often had to kick people out- or the bathroom. That lasted one month and my daughter gave up nursing at 7 months. With my second child I made a huge deal about it to HR and basically was determined to make it work until my son was 1. We were also in new office space. They added a lock to a conference room, added non-see through floor to ceiling frosted glass, and did not allow it to be scheduled. I also bought a mini-fridge to keep at my desk, and enough extra pump suplies so I could wash everything at home. I had the hands-free nursing bras and brough my laptop computer to the conference room with me and used that time to catch up on emails. I think it did work because I went to our HR, and because I did not accept going to the bathroom to pump. It was not really a fight with HR, but I had to be persistent. I am also an architect.
Our first office did not have that great of a space – large conf. room without a lock, and I often had to kick people out- or the bathroom. That lasted one month and my daughter gave up nursing at 7 months. With my second child I made a huge deal about it to HR and basically was determined to make it work until my son was 1. We were also in new office space. They added a lock to a conference room, added non-see through floor to ceiling frosted glass, and did not allow it to be scheduled. I also bought a mini-fridge to keep at my desk, and enough extra pump suplies so I could wash everything at home. I had the hands-free nursing bras and brough my laptop computer to the conference room with me and used that time to catch up on emails. I think it did work because I went to our HR, and because I did not accept going to the bathroom to pump. It was not really a fight with HR, but I had to be persistent.

]]> By: Katrina http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-1012 Katrina Thu, 19 Aug 2010 03:46:45 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-1012 Wow. What a story. Thank you for sharing it. Jeez...and your boss was in a "healing" profession? I wonder if his attitude will change when his wife is nursing their baby... Wow. What a story. Thank you for sharing it. Jeez…and your boss was in a “healing” profession? I wonder if his attitude will change when his wife is nursing their baby…

]]> By: H. A. http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-1011 H. A. Thu, 19 Aug 2010 02:00:17 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-1011 Wow your writing has brought tears to my eyes as I remember my own horror story with pumping at work. I am glad to know I am not alone in these type of situations. I still feel the guilt and sadness and the tears well up in my eyes every time I think about how I had to give my daughter formula after the situation led to a drastically reduced milk supply. My Story: I worked at the front desk of a Chiropractors office and had told my boss that I would need to pump my milk at work before taking my 3 month maternity leave. But I did not discuss the specifics with him, which was a big mistake. He asked my all sorts of questions such as 'Why do you need to do it?' and 'Why can't you do it before you come to work?' etc. and after explaining everything to him he gave me a 15 minute break during which I was supposed to pump in the bathroom because there was no other available space. (Which was not true, there was a private room with a locking door but that would have required a doctor to give up an appointment slot and the chance to earn a couple of hundred dollars). After pumping in the bathroom on my first day back, I decided I would have to do it in my car since it was vastly inappropriate and unsanitary to sit on the toilet while pumping in a bathroom shared with another office. So began a month of pumping in my car in the parking lot which was filled with construction workers building a new sidewalk. My shift was only 6 hours but with only 1 break of 15 minutes about 3 hours into my shift, my milk supply began to diminish. My boss (who's wife was pregnant) was so hard to talk to, he was clearly annoyed that I was interrupting his schedule and did not want to discuss the situation. One day he found a stack of papers I had printed on the laws concerning breastfeeding at the workplace in our state in the copy machine and told me that I should not be printing personal things while I was a work. I told him that actually I had printed them out for him, and it was not inappropriate since it concerned my job, and could he please read the papers. I left them on his desk and he did not answer me or make eye contact with me. I doubt he ever read them. After 2 weeks I was so stressed out about the situation that I decided it was not worth working part time for $15 an hour so I put in my two weeks notice. I did not tell my boss I was quitting because of the circumstances he forced me to pump in and the way he made me feel and treated me. I know that I could have taken him to court etc. but I just felt like I just never wanted to see him again, I did not want to see him in court and argue with his expensive corporate lawyer and feel all the stress and negativity of the situation. I just wanted to stay home with my baby and breastfeed her. So after my two weeks notice I stayed at home and nursed my four month old daughter. The only problem is that she started to look really skinny and wanted to nurse all the time. I realized I was not making enough milk for her. I tried every method to increase my milk supply except for the medications which are not approved by the FDA (thus hard to get) and about $800 for a months supply. Then a horrible Lactation Consultant told me that I will just have to start giving my daughter a bottle or two of formula a day, and that there is nothing wrong with formula, millions of babies drink it every day and are perfectly healthy and happy. ( Not what I expected to hear from her). Well this just led to an even lower milk supply and months of emotional turmoil as I pumped every hour in a fervent attempt to increase my supply to no avail. After a few months I decided to stop beating myself up about it because I was just creating negative energy that might be contributing to the situation. So since then I have been breastfeeding my daughter whenever she wants to (mainly in the morning, nap time, and bedtime), and giving her formula when she is still hungry after nursing. Now she is 1 year old and I have just become certified as a Lactation Counselor and am working towards becoming a Consultant. I still feel guilt and sadness that I ended up not being able to exclusively breastfeed my daughter because I went back to work at a job that underpaid me and treated me badly. I feel that the stress of the situation directly effected my milk supply. Next time I know how to talk to my boss about my needs and I know that personally, working at a job that is unwilling to meet my needs is not worth giving up breastfeeding. I hope that I can help other mothers as a Consultant and give them better advice than to just give their baby formula. I also take comfort in the Breastfeeding Motto: "I did the best that I could with the information and support that I had". H.A. Wow your writing has brought tears to my eyes as I remember my own horror story with pumping at work. I am glad to know I am not alone in these type of situations. I still feel the guilt and sadness and the tears well up in my eyes every time I think about how I had to give my daughter formula after the situation led to a drastically reduced milk supply.
My Story:
I worked at the front desk of a Chiropractors office and had told my boss that I would need to pump my milk at work before taking my 3 month maternity leave. But I did not discuss the specifics with him, which was a big mistake. He asked my all sorts of questions such as ‘Why do you need to do it?’ and ‘Why can’t you do it before you come to work?’ etc. and after explaining everything to him he gave me a 15 minute break during which I was supposed to pump in the bathroom because there was no other available space. (Which was not true, there was a private room with a locking door but that would have required a doctor to give up an appointment slot and the chance to earn a couple of hundred dollars). After pumping in the bathroom on my first day back, I decided I would have to do it in my car since it was vastly inappropriate and unsanitary to sit on the toilet while pumping in a bathroom shared with another office. So began a month of pumping in my car in the parking lot which was filled with construction workers building a new sidewalk. My shift was only 6 hours but with only 1 break of 15 minutes about 3 hours into my shift, my milk supply began to diminish.
My boss (who’s wife was pregnant) was so hard to talk to, he was clearly annoyed that I was interrupting his schedule and did not want to discuss the situation. One day he found a stack of papers I had printed on the laws concerning breastfeeding at the workplace in our state in the copy machine and told me that I should not be printing personal things while I was a work. I told him that actually I had printed them out for him, and it was not inappropriate since it concerned my job, and could he please read the papers. I left them on his desk and he did not answer me or make eye contact with me. I doubt he ever read them.
After 2 weeks I was so stressed out about the situation that I decided it was not worth working part time for $15 an hour so I put in my two weeks notice. I did not tell my boss I was quitting because of the circumstances he forced me to pump in and the way he made me feel and treated me. I know that I could have taken him to court etc. but I just felt like I just never wanted to see him again, I did not want to see him in court and argue with his expensive corporate lawyer and feel all the stress and negativity of the situation. I just wanted to stay home with my baby and breastfeed her. So after my two weeks notice I stayed at home and nursed my four month old daughter.
The only problem is that she started to look really skinny and wanted to nurse all the time. I realized I was not making enough milk for her. I tried every method to increase my milk supply except for the medications which are not approved by the FDA (thus hard to get) and about $800 for a months supply. Then a horrible Lactation Consultant told me that I will just have to start giving my daughter a bottle or two of formula a day, and that there is nothing wrong with formula, millions of babies drink it every day and are perfectly healthy and happy. ( Not what I expected to hear from her). Well this just led to an even lower milk supply and months of emotional turmoil as I pumped every hour in a fervent attempt to increase my supply to no avail.
After a few months I decided to stop beating myself up about it because I was just creating negative energy that might be contributing to the situation. So since then I have been breastfeeding my daughter whenever she wants to (mainly in the morning, nap time, and bedtime), and giving her formula when she is still hungry after nursing. Now she is 1 year old and I have just become certified as a Lactation Counselor and am working towards becoming a Consultant. I still feel guilt and sadness that I ended up not being able to exclusively breastfeed my daughter because I went back to work at a job that underpaid me and treated me badly. I feel that the stress of the situation directly effected my milk supply. Next time I know how to talk to my boss about my needs and I know that personally, working at a job that is unwilling to meet my needs is not worth giving up breastfeeding. I hope that I can help other mothers as a Consultant and give them better advice than to just give their baby formula. I also take comfort in the Breastfeeding Motto: “I did the best that I could with the information and support that I had”.
H.A.

]]> By: Katrina http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-1009 Katrina Wed, 18 Aug 2010 22:52:27 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-1009 I just read your pumping story, Christina. Thanks for sharing that. Wish it had been easier for you, and for others of you who left comments. Send that employer fact sheet around! I just read your pumping story, Christina. Thanks for sharing that. Wish it had been easier for you, and for others of you who left comments. Send that employer fact sheet around!

]]> By: Christina B. http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-1008 Christina B. Wed, 18 Aug 2010 22:45:32 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-1008 I got a couple pumping stories like this. Mine are kinda funny though. I'm so happy you wrote that factsheet for the employers. http://christinabazarian.blogspot.com/2010/08/tales-of-breastpump.html I got a couple pumping stories like this. Mine are kinda funny though. I’m so happy you wrote that factsheet for the employers.

http://christinabazarian.blogspot.com/2010/08/tales-of-breastpump.html

]]> By: kate http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-973 kate Mon, 09 Aug 2010 20:37:40 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-973 ha. i am an architect, in a small male-dominated office. my ONLY choice would have been the bathroom. i didn't even think to try to pump at work. i didn't have the energy in me for the fight. ha. i am an architect, in a small male-dominated office. my ONLY choice would have been the bathroom. i didn’t even think to try to pump at work. i didn’t have the energy in me for the fight.

]]> By: the grumbles http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-867 the grumbles Thu, 15 Jul 2010 18:26:24 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-867 i pump in a bathroom. that is the "space" provided for me. i've come to terms with it and i'm on month 10, but all i could think about when you were describing the closet with the barely latching door is how much i would LOVE to have a fancy room like that. one without a toilet. i pump in a bathroom. that is the “space” provided for me. i’ve come to terms with it and i’m on month 10, but all i could think about when you were describing the closet with the barely latching door is how much i would LOVE to have a fancy room like that. one without a toilet.

]]> By: Unions.Org Blog» Blog Archive » Child Care In The Public Service http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-808 Unions.Org Blog» Blog Archive » Child Care In The Public Service Thu, 01 Jul 2010 22:40:53 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-808 [...] as to insist that sick employees work, fire women over pregnancy, where having the time or the space to breastfeed a new baby is often a luxury for a working mother, and where there are serious [...] [...] as to insist that sick employees work, fire women over pregnancy, where having the time or the space to breastfeed a new baby is often a luxury for a working mother, and where there are serious [...]

]]> By: Holly http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/2010/06/24/this-sucks-part-iii/comment-page-1/#comment-799 Holly Mon, 28 Jun 2010 17:09:11 +0000 http://www.workingmomsbreak.com/?p=1128#comment-799 The first thing I would like employers/HR/colleagues to know is that it is a law. I think the story points out how difficult is for a pregnant woman or new mother to have to point this out. We already feel so sheepish for being tired and unable to stay late, or for even taking maternity leave! We set up situations where we can work from home. I remembering feeling like I was getting favors. Not that I should have felt that way, but I did. I know we need to advocate for ourselves and others, but it is extremely difficult. The more that is already known and in place the better. The first thing I would like employers/HR/colleagues to know is that it is a law.
I think the story points out how difficult is for a pregnant woman or new mother to have to point this out. We already feel so sheepish for being tired and unable to stay late, or for even taking maternity leave! We set up situations where we can work from home. I remembering feeling like I was getting favors. Not that I should have felt that way, but I did. I know we need to advocate for ourselves and others, but it is extremely difficult. The more that is already known and in place the better.

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